More payroll fun!

We all know about Lupica's obsession with the Yankees payroll. He was even kind enough to remind us how much the Yankees have spent since the Yankees last won the world series on a yearly basis.

Now that the Yankees have won the world series, maybe he can inform us how much the Mets have spent since they last won the world series!

Don't hold your breath. It won't happen.

But, since I hate the Mets, and Lupica, I did some research...the Mets have spent $1,597,000,000 since 1986!

$1.6 BILLION.

Suck on that, Lupica.

Same shit, different season.

So Lupica has to start his blurbs with, of course, a Yankee payroll diss!

I love it when I hear the Red Sox are "inching" up on the Yankees in payroll now that they're within $40 million.

Right.

It's practically first-and-goal!

Ha! First and goal! I get it! Except...that's a football phrase. So it doesn't really work, Mike.

How about "They're in the same ballpark!"

Oh wait, that doesn't show any anti-Yankee bias.

Oh well.

Imagine they were, say, $70 million apart...or even $77 million apart!

Like the Mets...and the Nationals...or the Marlins!

Ouch! 2-4 against two of the worst teams in baseball! At home!

C'mon, Mike! Give us the scoop!

Joe West has never been any kind of huggy bear in baseball, and he got jumped pretty good for saying that the Yankees and Red Sox play ridiculously long games.
But you know what?

The Red Sox and Yankees play ridiculously, stupidly long games, occasionally nine-inning games that don't just push four hours but go past five.

Occasionally past five hours?

Since 2000, the Yankees and Red Sox have played each other 183 times.

How many times do you think one of their 9 inning games made it over 5 hours?

Try...zero! Nice job, Mike!

And just for shit and giggles, out of those 183 games, how many do you think made it over 4 hours? Including extra inning games?

Twelve. That's right, only twelve.

How many were UNDER three hours?

Forty two!

So suck on it, Joe West.

And Mike, well, you're just a douche.

By the way, anyone remember in early 2007, when there was talk that George Steinbrenner was going to step down as the owner of the Yankees?

This is what the little douche wrote about it...

...if it is a member of the Steinbrenner family who eventually has the final say around the Yankees, no one knows if they will turn out to be some kind of first-rate sportsman and businessman.

Or if the Yankees might end up with their very own Dolan.

Since then, the Yankees have won the world series.

There is only one team in New York that has owners comparable to Dolan...the Mets.

I've been waiting three fucking years for Lupica to make that comparison.

Please. We know it will never happen.

It's (not) hard to believe Mets collapse again.

Here we go again, the Mets have another end of season collapse.

Let's see how Mike puts his stupid spin on it.

It was the last of the ninth now at Shea Stadium, last of the ninth in all ways, and they were all standing and begging for one last miracle out of the place.

Didn't happen.

Again.

They didn't want a big miracle now at Shea. Just a small one.

Two runs in the bottom of the ninth in a series in which they only scored FIVE runs total?

That's not a small miracle.

That's up there with walking on water.

They were playing to keep playing now, force a game against the Brewers at Shea tonight, see who would get the last playoff spot in the National League this year.

Ah, there's that Lupica Poetry we've all come to expect when Mikey tries to, once again, dress up a Mets collapse.

It had been 2-2 after Carlos Beltran hit one over the wall in left and toward Citi Field in the bottom of the sixth, made the place sound the way it had always sounded in big moments like this

All two of them.

But on the last weekend of the season and the last weekend of baseball Shea will ever have, the Mets scored a total of five runs.

One Friday, two Saturday, two Sunday.

It is a bit of a problem with the core Mets stars, Wright and Beltran and Jose Reyes and Carlos Delgado:

They all do just enough to break your heart in the end.

When the Yankees tank, it's "payroll", "not clutch", "ARod tabloids" and "soft Jeter."

When the Mets fall apart in epic fashion, two years in a row now to the lowly Marlins, with their $120 million less payroll than the Mets, it's a "bit of a problem."

Newsflash, Mike you midget genius - the Mets didn't get eliminated for lack of hitting.

Their bullpen is a fucking joke.

Omar Minaya is responsible for this putrid joke of a bullpen - why the hell are you giving him a pass?

They will just remember the Mets getting passed in the stretch, again, and that is why a lot of these players, and maybe at least one core player, have to go.

Yes, the Mets should pick players' names out of hat to determine who has to go.

Or they could get 2 relievers and win their division by 6 games.

Great things, magic things, had always happened in the late innings at Shea, hadn't they?

16 blown saves by the Mets bullpen.

Now that is some serious late inning "magic."

To the end, the 56,000 wanted to believe, tried to believe, that the Marlins couldn't do it to them again on the last day, the way they did last year.

If only the Marlins payroll was under $20 million.

If only.

So many of the 56,000 had come to see the goodbye ceremonies when the game was over. But really they had come to yell their heads off, make the place sound the way it was supposed to, for one more day.

Many came for the ceremonies; all came to yell their heads off.

No one came to see the Mets win - good thing.

The 56,000 still wanted one more day, because you always do in sports.

Actually, they wanted one more win.

But then Wright, whose numbers were better than he hit down the stretch, popped out and Endy Chavez grounded back to the pitcher. Two outs. It had been two outs and nobody on in Game 6 in '86 before Carter got a single.

22 fucking years ago.

Can you say, "stretch?"

Damion Easley walked now, and that made Ryan Church the tying run at the plate.

Just the way the Mets fans wanted it.

He put a good swing on the ball and for a moment you thought he'd gotten it,

Speak for yourself.

but he hadn't.

Nope, he hadn’t.

The ball ended up in the center fielder's glove and it wasn't just one season ending out there, it was all of them.

Ummm…what?

No roller from Mookie down the line. No game today.

The miracles always came easier at Shea when the Mets were good enough.

Twice in their history.

These Mets aren't.

Two years in a row, the Mets failed miserably against a team whose payroll was over $100 million less than theirs.

Two years in a row, Mike Lupica fails to mention the Mets payroll – all we get is Lupica Poetry.

Another job well done by the dwarf.