We love the Yankees. We hate Mike Lupica.
Let us know how much you hate him!
Let Mike Lupica know, too!

Monday, May 3, 2010

Cano Sucks!!!

So let's see…Robinson Cano is playing like a madman…leave it to a douche like Lupica to rain on his parade!

So you know: Through Friday night's games Austin Jackson - the kid the Yankees traded away for Curtis Granderson - was hitting .350 for the Tigers and had two more hits for the season than Robinson Cano does.

Lupica was on the right track. If anything, he could have ripped the Yankees for trading Austin Jackson away for Curtis Granderson. Certainly, Austin Jackson is doing awesome, and Granderson, other than lighting up Papelbon, really hasn't done much at the plate.

But why let logic get in the way of Yankee bashing?

At a time when Cano is supposed to be the hottest guy in the world and MVP of everything.

I can't believe I have to waste my time looking up the stats of these two players to make Lupica look like an ass.


Christ…it took me about 25 seconds to collect these stats…25 seconds I'll never get back!!!

Damn you, Lupica!!!

Jackson stats:
AB - 109
BA - .367
Hits - 40
2B - 7
3B - 2
HR - 1
RBI - 8
BB - 10
K's - 34
OBP - .420
SLG - .495
OPS+ - 146

Cano stats:
AB - 93
BA - .387
Hits - 36
2B - 6
3B - 1
HR - 9
RBI - 21
BB - 8
K's - 12
OBP - .433
SLG - .763
OPS+ - 223

So, what have we learned? Other than Lupica, once again, is cherry picking stats to prove his worthless point?

Austin Jackson has 4 more hits (by May 3rd) than Cano…in sixteen more at bats!!! Give me a fucking break, Mike! Cano leads the league in OPS+!!! Jackson leads the league in strike outs! Look at the home runs!!! Jesus fucking Christ!!! *(&)#Q)(*#@&!!!!11!!!!

Cano isn't supposed to be the hottest guy in the world!!! Obviously, Jose Reyes is!

Speaking of Lupica's inflatable sex toy...

Reyes stats:
BA - .216
HR - 0
SB - 4
RBI - 6
OPS+ - 51

I mean, who really gives a shit about the rest...oh, except Lupica, who claims that Reyes "is the one you want to watch the most"


And now it's time for more Shits And Giggles!!!

Lupica December 17th column headline - "Champion New York Yankees fall to second place behind Boston Red Sox in arms race"

Yankees team ERA - 3.63 - 4th in AL
Red Sox team ERA - 4.78 - 12th in AL