New York Baseball Blows! Reality TV Rules!

I finally figured it out.

Mike wants to score with Simon Cowell.

It all came to me today when I read this article, that not only bashes the Yankees (shock), but the Mets too!

I guess he gave up on Reyes and is moving on to bigger and better (and British) things.

The New York baseball season hasn't happened yet, has it?

Wow, that American Idol really sucked you in, Mike.

Unless you think this is all the Yankees and Mets have.

Really, this is what the baseball season in New York has been so far:

One start for Joba.

All the talk about Willie Randolph's job.

Actually, if you were a fan (which you obviously are not) you would know there is a lot going on.

About 120 games between the two teams; some good, some bad, some ugly.

This is why fans watch baseball – because we never know what’s going to happen.

Kind of like how you watch reality TV, except in our case, there is talent on our TVs.

And Hank Steinbrenner talking, constantly, almost every day, every news cycle, as if somebody has injected him with truth serum, talking about everything and everybody as if talking can turn him into his old man.

An owner is disappointed in his incredibly high payrolled team. He’s not allowed to talk about it? How come it’s only you who is allowed talk? No one even listens to your sorry ass. They just read your dopey articles, shake their heads in disappointment, then line their birdcage with your weekly garbage.

There is so much that we don't know about these two teams after more than two months of the season.

Exactly, you douche bag! We don’t know if they are going to stay at .500, or if they are going to face each other in the world series.

This is why fans watch the games. We are into it. You, obviously, are not.

So fuck off.

… I always go into the men's final at the French thinking my man Federer has a chance to beat Nadal.

Your man. Please. We all know there is more than one man.

Be proud of your homosexuality, Mike. Embrace it.

You wonder if all the other baseball networks covered Jason Giambi's checked swing Friday night as if it were part of some vast right-wing conspiracy.

You have a problem with YES questioning a possible game-changing bad call? It was a shitty call; they talked about it.

You call this journalism, Mike? You couldn’t come up with anything better? Not even a reality TV comparison, or a comparison to Obama beating Clinton?

Jeez you are slipping.

Although I do like how you always compare a Yankee story to some national event.

So predictable...and stupid.

Their personalities couldn't be more different, but there are a lot of nights during the baseball season when Keith Hernandez is as fun and unpredictable and occasionally as loopy as Scooter used to be.

Yeah, like when he went off about a girl being in a dugout instead of at home washing dishes.

Fun, unpredictable, and loopy, indeed.

Maybe you can add in "drunk" and "high on coke," like he was in the '86 Mets dugout.

Go suck his cock and get it over with.

You keep thinking the networks have reached new bottoms when it comes to their reality-show choices, but now here comes, "I Survived a Japanese Game Show."

What do you call a reality TV addict?

I call them assholes.

No one would ever call me a hockey guy…

Newsflash – no one would ever call you a guy.

I sort of had a feeling that Paul Pierce hadn't suffered some sort of compound fracture of the right knee when he went down Thursday night.

Because you are such an athlete Mike.

My second son, Alex, graduated on Friday.

I wonder if Mike remembers life before Tivo…imagine all the family shit he must have missed because of his reality TV schedule.